Counsellor Sarah Barr shares ways to decrease the pressure Donegal mammies put on themselves to be perfect.
Today mums feel enormous pressure to be the ‘perfect mum’. It can feel at times like a competitive sport. This coupled with social media and the pressure intensifies, as social media provides a platform for us to compare ourselves with others.
Some traits we may believe make the ‘perfect mum’ can include being super organised, having a spotless house, being fit and healthy and cooking meals from scratch.
When we don’t feel we are living up to the unrealistic standards we put on ourselves, we can feel like failures and guilt kicks in. Triggering of feelings of anxiety and low self worth.
The ‘perfect mum’ is a myth.
A woman’s priorities change when she becomes a mum.
Once we become mums we start to judge ourselves by the targets we have missed. For example, if your child does not talk/walk as quickly as other children. We see that as our failure.
Then we have the ‘mammy guilt’.
No matter what we do or don’t do, it is there.
If you’re a working mum, the guilt of going to work is there. If you are a stay-at-home mum it can at times feel isolating.
Comparison ONLY serves to make you feel worse about yourself.