Thoroughly Modern Mammy looks back on a dreamy bathtime that was invaded by reality.

Don’t you just love to have Bubble Baths?

Every so often, I leave The Him to deal with the baby monitor, disappear into the bathroom, (remove all the toys from it) and fill it with smelly bath lotion.  I sometimes even sip on a glass of Sauvignon while I soak.

If I feel like really spoiling myself, I light some scented candles.

It is utter bliss.

To get a few minutes, however long or short, where you know the kids are safe in someone else’s care and you can completely relax, is a luxury that I never appreciated until I had children.

One bubble bath remains in my memory…

I had reached out for the wine glass and sighed. The golden liquid swishing around the huge glass looked extra pretty and lush in the candlelight. I found myself stopping to look at the scene in front of me.

Had I had a camera, this would have been a cool photograph.

Candlelight, suds, the gold Sauvignon, my recently painted nails.  It was all quite fabulous; classy; romantic even!  The photograph would have been the perfect accompaniment to an article on a Yummy Mummy, or indeed a perfect pamper evening.


I sipped on the cold wine and enjoyed the flavours. It had been quite a while since I had had wine in the bath! Deep breath and relax. And then smile as I felt a little bit of the “Me B.C” creeping back.
Yes. This was Heaven.

And then I turned my head slightly to the left…
On the edge of my “photograph of perfection” was a reminder of real life.

Along the side of the bath, was the full collection of Disney princesses…the bath toy versions…which are pretty, but a little creepy when you consider the size of their heads in relation to their bodies!
(And the Rapunzel doll looks like she’s high on something illegal!)
Interspersed with these Princesses, were multicoloured rubber ducks, glaring at me through their pirate eye-patches.


I looked to the right.
The over-flowing laundry basket looked like it was puking clothes.

And so my picture perfect Yummy Mummy moment suddenly became a snapshot of reality.
And I simply laughed.
I focused again on the centre view. If I just kept looking straight ahead, I could pretend for a few minutes that I had nothing to worry about but the suds and that my servants would sort out the laundry!

And so that is what I did. I finished sipping the Sauvignon, stared at the candle flame dancing through the suds, and relaxed.

When I was suitably wrinkly and relaxed, (and the water was starting to get too cold to enjoy), I turned my attention back to Cinderella and her band of ducking pirates.

Yes, I was cross at them for ruining my picture perfect moment, but still.
They represent my reality.
My reality is that I am an overgrown child who quite likes the colourful mess of bath toys in the bathroom.
And I don’t have servants so the puking laundry basket would be dealt with, by me…but not until the next morning.

But for just a little while, I was Suds-And-Sauvignon