In a heartfelt poem, Maria Rushe looks at the many types of mums that exist... why labels don't matter at all.
It’s September. As we all struggle to settle into the craziness that is “routine” with our kids and lives and activities and commitments, we are more susceptible to Mammy Guilt than ever.
These weeks can be overwhelming for our kids, but guess what? We are allowed to beoverwhemed too.
While most of us are glad of the return to routine, that doesn’t mean it’s a walk in the park. Adjustments are needed and it takes time to find your groove, so allow yourself the transition time. It’s not just kids who need to adjust.
So what IS the Perfect Mum?
Baby-wearing Mum, Carry her Mum,
Co-sleeping Mum, Cot-sleeping Mum,
Bedroom of his own Mum,
Still in my bed when she’s 4 Mum,
Who cares as long as he sleeps Mum?
A Disposable Nappy Mum, Cloth-Nappy Mum,
Dodee Mum, Suck the thumb Mum,
A baby monitor Mum, Check her twenty times Mum,
Camera in the bedroom Mum,
I’ll hear him if he calls Mum,
Baby-lead weaner Mum, Organic food only Mum,
Puree it myself Mum, Buy it off the shelf Mum,
Feed them anything Mum, He won’t eat it anyway Mum,
Fish finger Freezer Friday Mum,
Leftovers in my tum Mum
Always positive parenting Mum,
Doing it all in heels Mum,
Never tell them No Mum
Child is in control Mum
Boundaries help them Grow Mum
Nurture them and Love Mum
Ask patience from above Mum
Shower him with kisses Mum,
Temper is in pieces Mum,
Cherish every second Mum,
Will bedtime ever come Mum,
Reading her a story Mum
Playing with his toys Mum
Letting her be bored Mum
Cuppa always cold Mum
Helicopter or Lawnmower Mum?
Let them fall and run Mum,
Breastfeeding Mum, Bottlefeeding Mum,
Whatever as long as they’re fed Mum.
Screaming and exhausted Mum,
Need a shower and pee Mum,
Calm and zen and ‘Got this’ Mum
Stay-at-home with kids Mum,
Go to work, Work from home,
Have to pay the Bills Mum,
Married, single, step-mum,
Co-parenting, need some help Mum,
Foster mum, adopting mum,
Holding on to friends Mum.
Trying Mum, Lost one Mum,
Wish with all my heart for one,
Happy mum, Sad Mum,
Frustrated at myself Mum,
Crying mum, Laughing Mum,
Fitting everything in Mum
Mum Buns, Mum Tums,
Stetchmarks, hormones and Bumps Mum
Afterschool, Sports and Pool, Taxi everyone Mum,
Homework Fun, Housework Done
Trying my best every day mum.
Kids come first, Mum’s the worst,
Will this bubble ever burst?
Give your kids the love they need
And to the labels give no heed…
I could keep going.
Mums are amazing. We manage to be many of these Mums at once, but NO ONE can be all of them.
If you are putting yourself under pressure to fit a label that doesn’t fit you, cut it off.
As long as your kids are loved and fed and cared for, you’re doing just fine Mum.
It can’t be perfect all the time, neither can you. But remember that usually, the flaws you see in yourself, are only seen by you.
To your kids, YOU are their Perfect Mum.
And I am the perfect Mum for MY kids…even if you don’t agree with how I do things.